My friend met someone online and they went on one date. It was mediocre at best and she was not devastated when she didn’t hear from him. FIVE days after the date, he texted to say that he had a good time, but he’s not interested. She did not initiate the conversation, and was completely fine with letting it die. Why would he go out of his way after radio silence for five days to say he doesn’t want to date her? Obviously he hadn’t heard from her either, so she was not interested in dating him. Anyway, she totally called him out and said “I don’t know why you felt the need to text me after 5 days to tell me you’re not interested, but thanks, I’m not interested either.” And his response was that he felt she needed “closure.” WTF. Like she’s been staring at her phone for 5 days waiting for him to contact her? This guy was obviously so full of himself he felt that my poor, pathetic friend had been waiting by the phone, so she obviously needed to hear that he was not interested.
I met this guy online and went on a first date with him. It was fine. He texted me a day later and asked if I wanted to go on a second date with him. I said “sure.” He seriously texted back and said “I’m actually kind of surprised you are agreeing to go on a second date with me–you seemed to be judging me on the first date.”
First of all, who does not judge someone on a first date, especially someone they met online, so no surprise there–pretty sure that’s what first dates are for. Secondly, if he felt uncomfortable with it, why would you ask me out again? And third–why would you bring it up?! Yeah, I judged you, I don’t really know you, I agreed to go on a second date with you. Big deal–why ruin it by calling me out and saying something like that? The second date never happened. I said something like “I thought that’s what first dates were for, but I’m definitely judging you for this conversation.” And he said “I don’t care if you’re judging me, I want an explanation.” Um…an explanation about why I want to go on a second date with you? Well, I don’t anymore, so problem solved.
My friend went out with this guy who bought her dinner. She said she thought he was nice. They decided to go to a bar after, and since he bought dinner, she said she would get his drink.. They ended up hanging out, playing pool, talking and having a great time. He kept going back to the bar to get drinks and kept bringing her one. She thought they were really hitting it off and the night was going well. Until she closed out her tab at the end of the night and realized that he had put every drink on her card. Without asking. He literally just kept walking up to the bar to order drinks for himself and her and just kept putting it on her tab. Her bill ended up being huge. He didn’t say anything or offer to pay her back. She told me she thought she made it clear that she offered to buy a drink not drinks for the entire night.
My friend had a great first date with this guy. She was all excited about him, but a day passed and she never heard anything, then another day, then a week, then two weeks. Clearly he was not interested so she gave up on him and started to look into dating someone else. Then out of nowhere, two weeks after their first date she gets the “hey, how are you?” text. She responded politely and when he asked her out on a second date, she thought about it. It really seemed like he went out with her once, was not interested, maybe went on one or two dates with other girls since and is circling around to her again. No one waits that long for a second date.
She said she had a great time on their date, but that she would rather go out with someone who is actively interested in her. He said that he is interested! He just didn’t want to seem pushy. Waiting two weeks post date to contact someone is not not being pushy–that is being totally uninterested.
I am a modern day woman who is self-sufficient and proud of my success. I don’t have anything super flashy but a decent car and I have a decent place to live (renting, not owning). This guy came to pick me up for our date–he rang the doorbell and I let him in. He walked in, looked around and said “wow, this is a nice place.” I thanked him and then he said “so you live with your parents?”
Excuse me? No–this is my place, thank you very much. I’m not some free-loader who still lives with my parents and I was so offended that he first remarked how nice it was and then jumped to the conclusion that I could not possibly live there without financial support. Not the greatest first impression pre-date.
My friend met this guy online. He seemed great on paper so she met him in person and he was actually really good looking. She asked him why he’s online dating and he said (totally seriously) “I’m clumsy, I’m forgetful and I’m not that smart.” Wow, way to sell yourself on the first date. It was definitely a turn off for her to meet a man with absolutely no self-confidence.
My roommate met this cute guy and they went on a first date. I was at home when she walked in and she was telling me that it was fine, and she had a nice time. As she’s telling me about the date (probably 10 seconds after walking in the door) her phone rings. She says “wow, I hope this isn’t him” picks up–has a short “wow! ok, thanks, yeah…” convo and hangs up. She told me it was him and she wasn’t really sure what he wanted–just to small talk. But 10 seconds after she walks through the door?! Sure, maybe he was really excited and had a great time, but you can text that, or call the next day. Kind of clingy to not even be able to wait a few minutes after the first date.
Hiking on a first date? Always say NO–you have been warned. I am not the most athletic person and he wanted to go to these waterfalls that was about an hour drive away from the town we were in. (reminder that this is a first date).
These are verbatim reviews from the hike online: “This was the hardest hike I’ve ever done. I literally felt like i I was going to die on certain parts.” “Try to avoid poison oak…also the trails are unmarked, and there are no switchbacks. You literally have to crawl up or even rock climb some parts.” “It seriously was like playing hot lava trying to avoid the poison oak.” THERE IS NO MARKED TRAIL. We spent 95% of the time praying we were in the right area. “Everyone here seems to think that the potential of falling to your death if you take a wrong step or fall is laughable. It is extremely challenging and dangerous.”
Um….so I asked him if he’d ever done this hike before and he said No, but that he had heard that it is awesome. Long story short, I ended up agreeing to go and it was one of the worst experiences of my life. He picked me up super early, we drove there, did the hike–I forced myself to have a good attitude and complete it–and he was actually super impressed with me. He didn’t realize it was going to be so difficult (even though a quick google search would have made it obvious). He said he knows some grown men who would have turned around, but I totally powered through. It took us HOURS, it was insanely hot, and I swear there was a point where I honestly thought I would need to be airlifted out of there. Because the trails are totally unmarked, we hiked a mile in the wrong direction before we realized we were totally lost and would probably need a search party to come get us. So we (smartly) hiked back the entire mile to find the trail again.
It took us about 7 hours and he dropped me back off at my house when it was dark. Then I never heard from him again and basically couldn’t walk for a week.
My friend went on one date with this guy–they were at a restaurant and the hostess handed them a drink menu. He was really upset that the prices were not on the drink menu–a little understandable, but this is not entirely unusual. When the waitress came, he angrily asked her why the prices were not on the menu. She apologized, and asked him which drink he wanted to know about, and she could tell him. My friend said he sat there in a huff and went through every single drink to this poor waitress (and the lack of prices is absolutely not her fault). And he pointed to each one asking “how much is this one?” “how much is this one?” “how much is this one?” The waitress politely told him the price of each drink, whereas most people at that point would have been “which one do you want to drink?!” But he was basically quizzing her out of spite. My friend sat there pretty appalled and never contacted him after that.